If there were a way to judge, let alone know, when one's short term memory is processed into (mid and) long term memory, would there be a way to optimize the speed and retention of new information?
The daily firehose of information in class recently has gotten to the point that I will stop to take a break, get up and move out of the stream; Perhaps caring a little less about whether I get every drop of knowledge. I will have occasional pangs of regret, for what, I am not entirely sure, as I do not know what I missed and therefore do not know what I do not know. (Yes, this is a circular, dog chasing his tail sort of thinking, but I have done it for so long, it is a hard habit to break.)
Habits to break: (1) Second hand smoking. Have to stop, have been doing this since childhood. At times I have a choice. (2) Jumping to the conclustion that it is (if not 'all') at least mostly my fault. [I hear that this is the opposite of most people that decidedly claim 'others' are the source of their misfortune (or perhaps some spiritually divine or evil intervention) affected their lot in life]. (3) Assuming that my self worth is directly a product of my work/career/ or profession. [Note: I have been working on this one for many years, with some progress.] (4) This may sound really silly, as I type this out loud, but here goes... I have to figure out how to give up my monk like abstinence from sex, as a multi-year geographic bachelor (has) = geographic celibacy. (Perhaps to figure out where I lost my 'mojo', to borrow a term, as it has been in storage for a long time. I have no idea where I put it. [I do have memories of being a more sexual being.] (5) Hmm... Waiting till the last minute isn't really a habit, as I continually reshape ideas, assignments, etc. up to the last minute, perhaps never satisfied, and harkening back to my 'failed perfectionism'. What I need to break is the need to find an appropriate stopping point (early enough) and then ask for an outside opinion for help with final revisions. Just stopping in time enough to be able to have a little mental distance and gain a little perspective...
There are many other habits that I am sure I could take the time to explore their pros and cons, but that would just keep me up at night.
I did learn a different perspective, or at least a way to think about marriage. Simply put, I know that romance has never been a realisitic foundation for a marriage; In fact, it is very unrealisitc as an expectation, and it is the hard fought 'relationship', as there are so many cliches, I'll say "within sane parameters" [and that can vary incredibly] the work of love even when you are angry, distracted, of the same or different opinion(s), is never done.
Blah blah blah. Do I really know what the hell I am talking about? Why should I trust my own tired, and should go to bed 'cause I have to get up really early sort of thinking? Sure, why not, for now. Gotta take the hypothesis and run with it. Thanks Socrates.
- Mike.
"Why should I trust my own tired thinking?" Because it's not what you're thinking, it's what you're feeling, and feelings are never wrong. :)
ReplyDeleteThe class firehose of information: you can't drink from a firehose... you're doing the best you can, when you study, repeat the info to yourself as if you were explaining it to another person. If you have questions, you can ask the prof, I hope?
How do you break a habit which isn't yours? (Second-hand smoking?)
About abstinence, what if I told you I wanted to take up piano? You might suggest I start listening to music first, to get in touch with my musical side. Watch people play, then start playing on my own, slowly building the steps. For reintroducing romance, maybe it's like that: sharing more with your partner, doing fun things together, maybe things that bring back joy in feeling, like dancing or hot-tubbing? Or maybe this starts with you alone before you bring your partner in? I give you a lot of credit for talking about this here because there is a lot of shame around discussing ourselves as sexual beings, but there shouldn't be.
Procrastination: I procrastinate ALL the time. I find that being overwhelmed is huge for me. I'm also easily distractible. I'm trying to figure this one out too, any suggestions you have, I'm paying attention! :)